Nine Things..

that I associate with a Gust Of Cold Air..

1. A Walk on the mountains (Possibly a reminiscence of a Rickshaw Ride I took late into the evening in December '99 through Mussorrie. Most memorable.)
2. A windy autumn day
3. A fancy hotel room (Quite an amusing association, this.. Not only do I imagine myself in a fancy hotel room, I can almost smell the scent of the wooden cupboards, clean linen and air-freshener. And for a moment, I unwind. Most heavenly.)
4. Winter Rain (Surely the best time of the year, when that comes along. With the exception of, of course, a Foggy day)
5. A failed romance
6. A broken friendship
7. A New Life
8. The Titanic

and finally,

9. Winters (Duh)

Tagged

by Kyra

I am thinking about…

.. how pathetically Shilpa Shetty carried herself.
.. how I shall fare academically this semester.
.. what the upcoming IIM-B Cultural Fest will be like.
.. how mediocre I seem to be at everything. If not pathetic.

I said...

nothing. I fear saying something I shall surely regret sooner or later.

I am…

.... someone I can't seem to change, no matter how hard I try.
I know one should be oneself. But couldn't I change just a little bit?

I want to…

Be adept at 2 things (that are worthwhile).
Move to a place with a better climate.
Feel inspired to write more often.
Learn how to talk less and wise.
Be more confident.
Tap my full potential.

I make with my hands…

Coffee, and pathetic coffee at that.

I wish…

My short term aspirations would come true. And long term.

I cry…

for selfish reasons.

I hear…

The Fan. The Insects. And the silence.

I wonder…

What decisions I'll end up making in the near future.

I regret…

Far too many things. But then again, I'm never satisfied.

I confuse…

Everyone who doesn't know me well enough. And a few of those who do.

I dance…

In my imagination. And I dance well.

I sing…

Only to be told to shut up. I wish my voice was, well, pleasant.

I am not always…

Talkative. I have my off days too.

I write…

far too occasionally. I suppose I'm lazy. And unlucky.

I need…

to be more occupied. Think less. I need to lose some weight and tone up.

*********

I tag all that have not been tagged.

Change

Isn't it funny how things can change?
Just when you thought all was perfect, everything seems new? All askew?
Returning to all that you left behind not so long ago, to find that it isn't there any more?
When you thought life is better, it gets worse.
You thought you took a step forward and found yourselves a mile behind.

The good old melodies go stale.
Brand new friendships fail.
Home is not where you thought it was.
Making decisions only because.

Is it a price for what is past? Or what I await?
Or is it simply fate?

It's Change.

"If you knew that you would find a truth
That would bring a pain that can't be soothed
Would you change?

If you knew that you would be alone
Knowing right, being wrong,
Would you change?

How bad, how good, does it need to get?
How many losses? how much regret?
What chain reaction would cause an effect?
Makes you turn around
Makes you try to explain
Makes you forgive and forget,
Makes you change"
- Tracy Chapman, Change

Of Ecology, Nomads And Innuendos

Why, just today I had made a sneaky attempt at luring my Electronics professor into an argument over how Hydel Power Plants were being erected at the cost of destruction of the entire ecology of a river and how human domination over Mother Nature wasn't a part of Lord's plan for us. Him being an ordinary selfish mortal of an engineering background wouldn't flinch beyond calling it 'a price to pay for development.' I would, au contraire, accuse him of being in alliance with 'A League Of Extraordinarily Apathetic Gentlemen' and proceed to enumerate one million and one ways that nature would revenge those that belonged to this Anti-Environmental Mafia. But initiating such a debate wouldn't be a cake-walk. And it was imminent for the success of my mission to find a way.
I thought I'd lure him with a plate of Cheeses. Only, I didn't carry my plate of cheeses to class that day. So I thought of an alternative approach. I would decoy him with a technical question. And right when he was least expectant of an outburst, I would present one. It would be no less than accusing him of mere scandal. And thus, I posed a cautiously well-framed question.


The cautiously well-framed question was 'put off' until he 'delved further into that area'. That "co-incidentally" did not happen.
Did he see right through my inquisition? Or did someone prompt him into dismissing me before I could lash my whip at him? A conspiracy, no doubt. But I was warded off.

Not disheartened, I looked ahead and eagerly anticipated my very first class of Environmental Sciences ever. Expectations were high. Aspirations unlimited. Finally, I was to be face to face with another being who would reciprocate my firm convictions against the advancement of technology at the cost of Ecological damage. If he were to suggest anything to the contrary, he would be failing at his duty, cheating himself and betraying those, few but loyal, that battled their own kind for the good of this planet and all that it harbours (besides us).
Needless to say, I was disappointed. The fellow knew no more about the environment than he did about Madonna's lipstick collection. Possibly, a lot less.
What he was good at, in fact, was Dramatics and elocution. The next 45 minutes, he spent reading off senseless statistics and meaningless numbers from the screen with such zest and sensation, one was convinced his classes had been Produced and Directed by either Alfred Hitchcock or Ekta Kapoor.
His elocution skills must have been marvellous for if none other, he had convinced at least himself of his supreme knowledge and expertise in his 'area of specialisation'.

His pupils did not feel deprived of reason to babble and chortle at him. He scarcely felt concious of himself but occasionally would ask us why we were roaring, put his hands dangerously close to his pelvis, raise them consequently (palms facing outwards) and ask "I'm okay na?", only sending us into another fit of sniggers.

He made constant references to what he had told us in 'yesterday's class.' On numerous occasions, I felt ever so tempted to correct him that we had necer had a class 'yesterday' to begin with. My inner wisdom prevented me from shattering his notions of lectures that had never taken place at all. And thank god too, for as it dawned upon me soon after, he had been all the while referring to a lecture he had delivered to us almost a year ago (three days to be precise) that I had missed.

I was only just about to curse him for being such a grave disappointment, a dimwitted fool and a bore that a rather explicit illustration of three men, unclad from head-to-toe holding up spears whilst exhibiting their genitalia appeared before us on the screen. Needless to say, some gasped, some one or two fainted while most, sooner or later, guffawed. As if that weren't enough, he too yelled "Yes! Yes! I wanted you all to see...."
(and passionately gesturing with his arms, mind and soul towards the innocent naked men on the screen, he approached the climax)
".... THIS is what we all were...."
(adopting a grand pose, holding up an imaginary spear of his own and thrusting his precious pelvis forward, boomed....)
"....HUNTERS!"

Our lungs collapsed in laughter.